THE ROAD TO A MARRIED LIFE
How My Life Started and Change After Marriage
HOW IT BEGINS, INTRODUCTION TO DEBT, UNFOLDING CONFLICTS, ARGUMENTS, RECONCILIATION, COMMUNICATIONS AND ACCEPTANCE
MANY MARRIED PEOPLE HAVE SAID, ENTERING MARRIAGE IS VERY EASY TO DO IT, BUT WHEN YOU GET THERE IT’S HARD TO DO THE ROLE!
Honestly, my marriage is neither extravagant nor cheap because we still spend the money to pay the venue and the food for the guest but I will just say it’s a simple wedding. We did all the work done with my husband, and we never asked for a wedding organizer for help, that’s a cut of cost for us and we’re happy about it, less stress and no debt after all.
Imagine this, my husband and I filed a leave of absence one day just for our wedding and the following day we reported back to work. See how easy for us entering the marriage life. And you see we did it the easy way and not the hard, exhausted and expensive way. It’s NO for me! Many have thought and even now think that an extravagant, elegant wedding will help your marriage life to make it successful. No way! That’s not how I view it. No, No! That’s not how you measure success in marriage.
Well, for some women out there I’m not against with this idea of having marriage like a fairy tale and huge expenses allotted just for the wedding. Hell Yeah do it, If that makes you happy then go with it. It’s not a matter of expenses, it’s a matter of being you happy in your wedding day. And you have also the capacity then do it, no one will go against your happiness if both of you has the mutual understanding of doing things like that. But making sure that taking into consideration of finances is a must here. Don’t start a marriage full of debt that’s not a good idea to start your marriage life in my point of view. But sometimes it depends on how view it, we’re different and if both of you have a job and you want something a share obligation then paying your debt for your wedding then that’s a good start for you, planning your finances obligation together and sharing the debt occurred by your marriage is a great idea. But well, again for me if I have a choice I will just save the money for our future adventure like travel together creating more memories, saving more for financial freedom goals because without debt believe me, life makes it easier for us to do things we love to do because we are in control of our finances. Imagine that? Imagine the idea you have spare money you can use to create more memories together and live the life you wish to live. Because having debt started in your marriage is giving you way more time to figure out and work your ass to pay it right away, otherwise, when you can use that time of figuring on how you spend it for your next travel adventure you can both have, with the spare of cash you have left.
Right? Let’s think twice. That’s a good way to start considering it. Our happiness doesn’t measure how extravagant our wedding is, but it’s how we feel the essence of marriage, how we feel intimate together and the love with our partner and seeing those eyes sparkling just for you is somewhat enough for me to see the joy that the love can give to make the wedding more special. And I can’t even trade this for an extravagant wedding.
Anyway, enough with that, let’s talk about when you’re there in your marriage life.
You know what everything unfolds when you are there, on the same roof living with your partner and doing the things you actually do before when you’re still alone meaning you have someone already to share your bedroom, to share your meals and to share your time with, and even to watch movie in NETFLIX you have someone to cuddle with. Haha
All of the stuff that we’ve been doing alone when we are still single most of us women are no longer there anymore, alone and single are no longer our forte, we tend to lose our own space, we tend to give so much in the relationship that we plan everything with your partner and so am I. That’s what I do. Everything from planning I also consider his happiness. I am happy with my choices and I consider his happiness too and that is mutual understanding.
In the long run of living together, I am able to see our relationship getting deeper and deeper good things and bad things occur in marriage life. And as new to marriage we are overwhelm with the idea of you and him to be perfect but in reality, No it’s not, no one is perfect. Happy moments, Arguments, Reconciliation and Acceptance is what you learn inside the context of marriage. Because without accepting the idea of change and both differences then why we accepts the idea of opening the new chapter of our lives? Right?
When I enter the chapter of my life called marriage, I open the fact that I am no longer living alone and there’s a human being I shared my life with and as the BIBLE says,
And they two shall be one flesh: so then they are no more two, but one flesh. – Mark 10:8
He is my partner, he is part of me, we are one now and he is the one who needs to know about what I’m doing and what my goals are so we could see the alignment of our decisions and we could see both worlds in our own context. I argue with my partner sometimes until such time that he never gets to like the decisions I am going to make with myself, thus that is where differences of both come in.
Sometimes, we feel being deprived of our little things in life and especially most of us women are so stubborn (I’m not an exception, haha) but letting in the right communications and understanding in between of every decisions and actions we make, it’s easier for us to live the married life away from conflicts and arising arguments.
We all both know that whatever conflicts, arguments, and differences may arise in your relationship inside marriage, with just sufficient supply of communications, understanding, and reflections you can overcome whatever challenges may come your way.
How about you? Is there anything you can share about you being married? Share it with us! 🙂